Weird Fetish of the Day: Sexy Geta
Weird Fetish of the Day is a recurring column in which Erik S. dissects various fetishes found in softcore pornography, as well as the possible history, psychology, and following of them. While rarely containing explicit nudity, it is markedly NSFW. Pizza Clubhouse claims no ownership over the images used in Weird Fetish of the Day (as if we’d actually want to).
I’m a big believer in the idea that people can have a sense of style, as opposed to fashion. Style is just your personal knowledge to make yourself look like you. It’s of no one else’s consequence, which is why it differs from the idea of fashion. Fashion is instead the greatest bastion of pretentiousness in a world overrun by superficial egotists who are somehow convinced they possess enough credentials to get away with making more in one year than most people do in a lifetime, simply by criticizing a person’s outfit for not possessing enough isosceles triangles. That being said, I’m no fashionista, but I’m willing to admit there are certain common sense rules that apply to everyone who wishes to avoid looking ridiculous. For example, you never wear socks with sandals. Unless you exist in that magical age realm of “no longer give a fuck” which is also generally accompanied by fat rolls, shirtlessness, and likely emphysema. I’m getting off track here. Wanna see what today’s Weird Fetish of the Day is?
MMM… I JUST GOT A BONER.
Okay, okay, not quite. It’s not just footwear. Rather to get it more specifically, today we’re gonna be covering sexy ‘geta’ sandals.
Ah, quite. Indubitably, I have developed an erection.
Weird Fetish of the Day: Nurses
Weird Fetish of the Day is a recurring column in which Erik S. dissects various fetishes found in softcore pornography, as well as the possible history, psychology, and following of them. While rarely containing explicit nudity, it is markedly NSFW. Pizza Clubhouse claims no ownership over the images used in Weird Fetish of the Day (as if we’d actually want to).
It’s weird. The sex world as a phenomenon has a long, surprisingly relevant and interesting history to it. Some might even call it rich. Honestly, it’s a big part of life whether the more prude amongst us like to admit. With the territory of such a time-honored field of study, there comes some classic stereotypes and tropes. Specifically, there’s a bunch of cliche fetishes/turn-ons out there, venerable and everlong to the point that we really don’t even remember why anyone found them to be sexy in the first place. I’ve covered sexy maids before, so now I move on to its sister-fetish (no, not like THAT), sexy nurses.
As a medical professional I can tell you that running your stethoscope between you boobs will distort the amplification and produce faulty readings. That’s really important to know, right? Guys?
Pizza Lab #4: Strawberry Shortcake
After four Pizza Labs, ideally I would have liked to think our staff has reached a sort of groove, and finally come up with a method to our decision-making process involved in selecting and formulating new ideas for pizzas.
That hasn’t happened yet. Hence my use of the qualifier “ideally”.
Instead, each new edition of Pizza Lab is more thrown together than a middle school student’s Livejournal page in the year 2004. The latest one demonstrates this perfectly, reaching fruition through basically nothing more than the exclamation “Oh! Let’s make a dessert pizza!” What followed was a long debate over whether to use pudding or not. That’s really as complicated as we get. Sorry if that disappoints any budding foodologists in the audience. Know what wasn’t disappointing? This pizza.
Strawberry Shortcake Pizza
This edition’s panel:
Erik S. So this was our first forray into the world of dessert pizza.
Meg A. Yep. We’ve been talking about doing a dessert pizza since starting pizza lab though. For awhile it was just kind of the abstract concept of dessert, and not a specific one though.
Erik S. Yeah, desserts is an awfully broad term, we all tend to throw it around like it means one food. i.e. “IT’S TIME FOR DESSERT!” is rarely answered with the philosophical pondering “But… what is dessert?”
Meg A. True. Until it’s time to decide on a pizza.
Erik S. Right.
Meg A. You tossed out a few ideas for what kind of dessert pizza we could do. We ultimately decided on strawberry shortcake. It made perfect sense considering that shortcake itself is a bit of a rich, doughy cake.
Erik S. Also because strawberry shortcake is my favorite type of dessert.
Weird Fetish of the Day: Tamakeri
Weird Fetish of the Day is a recurring column in which Erik S. dissects various fetishes found in softcore pornography, as well as the possible history, psychology, and following of them. While rarely containing explicit nudity, it is markedly NSFW. Pizza Clubhouse claims no ownership over the images used in Weird Fetish of the Day (as if we’d actually want to).
The porn world is a terrible place. Like, really terrible, if you think about it. And I’m not talking about Hollywood porn either. As with every other sport, hobby, and honor the U.S. once dominated, we’ve fallen by the wayside, into mediocrity, being eclipsed by much more perverted countries. Though given I started off with “The porn world is a terrible place” maybe that’s not such a bad thing. Either way most of our domestic, Hollywood level porn is fairly clean and wholesome in comparison to the rest of the world. Or as clean and wholesome as hardcore pornography as you can get. A movie which starts with a woman answering the doorbell, and finishes with her fucking the cable guy is pretty tame when compared with a girl writhing in tears on the ground of a bathroom while eight separate guys ejaculate and piss all over her naked body. What I’m trying to say is that most porn is gross, sadistic, and often downright misogynistic. So today we’re gonna mix things up. Today we’re gonna place women in the position of power. Today we’re gonna show men being kicked in the balls.
“I DON’T KNOW YOU!!”
Where in the World is Patrick R.
I admit it: I’ve been out of the groove lately. I haven’t spoken with the crew in just about a month. Pizza Clubhouse is ticking along at a good pace, and I hate that I have not contributed as much as I would like to. Lately, life has mostly been me scrambling to finish out this tumultuous semester of college. I also have a number of videos stacked up and a bunch of shit I need to still take care of. Let us dive into what Patrick R. is up to… Read the rest of this entry
The Cereal Report: Post Mini Cinnamon Churros
I dunno what it is about miniature versions of things that’s awesome. All the best novelties in life are just smaller versions of stuff. Pizza Bagels, Shetland Sheepdogs, the Game Boy Micro, we can’t get enough of them. I had heard years ago of a churro-themed cereal, but never had seen it in stores until I was recently tipped off to their being in stock at a local Path Mark. During a (failed) trip to buy video games, I decided to stop in and buy this cereal as a sort of consolation prize to my inner bawling child which was hysterical at the fact every store in the area was sold out of Luigi’s Mansion.
I’m 24 and this still excites me apparently.
Terrifying Pokedex Entries: #469 Yanmega
Did you know that Satoshi Tajiri, creator of the Pokemon franchise, originally developed the idea based on his childhood memories of bug-catching? It’s actually a very popular hobby in Japan, which comes as a surprise to nobody, considering what other things Japan is into. Children and adults alike take the time to learn the various names and identifications of insects in the area, and search high and low for the critters, to add them to their collections. Not that I’m knocking the practice, it’s a neat way to spend time outdoors and be closer with nature. I just think it’s funny to see such a simple idea be turned into a billion dollar video game franchise that essentially blends trading-cards, MMA, and borderline animal-abuse into an adorable anime style adventure loved by people of all ages. I’m sure everyone here is aware one of the various Pokemon types is the Bug-type. They’re all based on, well, bugs. There’s also something noble about them, as the game series as a whole was spawned from the idea of collecting insects. Early on, we were introduced to the Pokemon, Yanma, a cute red dragonfly.
Oh hello! You’re a cute little dragonfly!
Almost six years later, we were introduced to its evolution, Yanmega (yes its name is Yanmega), a nearly seven foot-long spiky abomination described as the “ogre darner” Pokemon.
Why hel- OH GOD.
#469 – Yanmega
Category: Ogre Darner Pokémon
Type: Bug/Flying
Pokemon Diamond: “By churning its wings, it creates shock waves that inflict critical internal injuries on foes.”
Pokemon Soul Silver: “The beat of its wings is so powerful that it dislodges full-grown trees when it takes off in flight.”
Pokemon Black: “Its jaw power is incredible. It is adept at biting apart foes’ heads while flying by at high speed.”
